Monday, October 11, 2004

Carrying the Yamim Noraim into the year

I like Yom Kippur. Somehow, I am not sure exactly how, I wind up feeling close to HK"BH(God). Obvioiusly it has to do with all the davening, the al cheit's, fasting, the nusach, spending so much time in shul, but there is something else. By midway through Neilah time, I usually get the feeling that Hashem has understood me, and accepted my teshuvah. It may be hubris on my part, but it is a very comforting feeling. I can daven through Sukkot(my favorite holiday) with incredible kavannah, keeping all the promises I made to Hashem and to myself. Usually all these good intentions have totally unravelled by Hannukah, if not Rosh Chodesh Mar Cheshvan. How to keep that incredible feeling of closeness, Devekut, with HK"BH through the year? I've tried spending more time davening(lack of sleep catches up), learning, and I think each year I am doing more than in the past year. But it never fails that by the time Elul rolls around again, and I look back at what I wanted to do, and compare it to what I did, I come up way short. Soooo,,,, how do we carry the Yamim Noraim feeling into the year? the floor is yours.(yes, I know all the comparisons to new years eve resolutions, 12 step programs, etc, but this should be different, it is HK"BH we are talking about, not losing 5 lbs.)

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